Tag Archives: Harassment

Humiliated on Pearse Street.

I’ve had a really good week. I went to some interesting live shows, spent time with loved ones, viewed some beautiful modern art, had dinner with a good friend and generally, felt rather happy. That is, until I let the words of a stranger affect me. It’s funny, isn’t it? How we let people get to us.

The sun was shining, it was sixteen degree’s in Dublin city and I had just ate a lovely breakfast at The Woolen Mill. A friend and I were walking down Pearse street, minding our own business, when three guys approached us. One of the guys stepped forward in front of us, he looked quite intimidating and to be honest, he looked rough. He pointed a finger at my friend and exclaimed “You, yeah. I would”, and then he pointed towards me, “You, not so much”. His act of comic genius sent his friends into a uproar of laughter, relishing in the sheer confidence their friend had, to walk up to two girls on the street, and rate them like cattle.

It all happened within seconds, but it was astonishing how slow time felt when it was occurring. Once the group of guys walked past us, both my friend and I stood there in shock. Not sure what to say to one another. Why would some one do that? What’s the payoff?

To be quite honest, I was hurt and humiliated by the experience.

We kept walking towards our destination in Temple Bar, and more the I thought about the situation, the more angry I felt. Why did I care? Why did it bother me? I was annoyed at myself for being annoyed by it! To be frank, I wouldn’t have sex with that guy if he was the last guy on earth and the human race depended on it. I didn’t think he was remotely attractive. So, why did I care that he thought I wasn’t attractive either? It really irked me.

elaineoneill.com

It pains me to admit this, but I cried out of pure frustration. Why didn’t I snipe back with a witty comeback to humiliate his intelligence, or lack there of. Also, I kept thinking, how many other girls had he done this to today? Or, ever? He had humiliated my friend and I. Were there other girls who were walking the streets of Dublin, eyes welling up with tears over the words of a stranger? It upset me to ponder that thought.

My self esteem has never been fantastic and this sure didn’t helped.

Thankfully, through out the day, I was able to move on with my life and not worry so much about what this random person thought of my appearance. I thought about my own self worth, and how it is not defined by the opinions of others. All that really matters, is what I think about myself. At the end of the day, I feel sorry for that guy, because he clearly doesn’t exert the qualities most people find attractive. And, while I may be no oil painting, I am a good person, who doesn’t gain joy from humiliating other people in public.

elaineoneill.com

After the entire ordeal, my friend Elaine, spoke to me about her experiences with similar situations and we chatted about a project she produced for college, that was based on the topic of harassment. We both came to the conclusion that it is important to call out this type of behavior. I thought about all the men in my life and how they would never do something like that to two women, walking down the street. And, if anyone I knew ever did such a thing, I would tell them they were being complete assholes. It’s usually pack-mentality that gives people the gall to do something like this, they get high off the thrill of doing something extreme in front of their friends, in order to impress them.

Newsflash! No one thinks you’re cool. 

It’s not a badge of honor to humiliate someone successfully. In fact, it makes you look like a terrible person. I truly do not understand why anyone would want to do something like that to another human being. The guy who did that to my friend and I, has probably long forgotten about this occurrence, while it still lingers in my mind days later. Which is the reason I am writing this blog post, to express how I feel about the entire scenario, in order to let it go fully. If one person reads this and decides against doing something like this in the future because of it, or decides to call out a friend for doing something similar, then it’s worth it for me to post this.

 

BEING HARASSED FOR MY HAIR COLOUR!? UGHHHH!

CREEPY GUY ON THE BUS