Tag Archives: Self Confidence

Erika Jayne is helping me to discover my inner goddess!

I’m not sure if you know this about me but, I really enjoy reality television.

One of my favourite reality TV stars is Erika Girardi AKA Erika Jayne. Who features on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. At first glance, people are usually too quick to judge Erika. Lumping her in with other reality stars and assuming she has nothing of interest to say.

They couldn’t be more wrong.

Erika Jayne is the fabulous alter-ego and stage persona of Erika Girardi. She’s a Mom, a singer and a all-round entertainer, who exudes confidence and a youthful playfulness. Erika acknowledges that as people, we are layered, we are many different things, to ourselves and others, all at once.

In a recent interview with Nylon, she stated, “No one is one way all the time. No one is buttoned up all the time and no one is wild all the time. There are different parts to your personality, different layers – and that’s really what Erika Jayne is, another layer to a human being.”

wj3

Source: Nylon

Watching Erika on RHOBH has made me realize how important it is first and foremost, to be true to ourselves and secondly, to live a unapologetically authentic life. What I love about Erika, is that she doesn’t give a sh*t what other people think about her. This is made very clear in her popular, hit single How Many F**ks? and in her take-no-crap attitude.

I think it’s clear by now, that Erika Jayne represents something for me. She represents the opportunity to embrace self-love, instead of running away from it in fear of coming across as vain. She once said “I want to represent freedom; the courage to be yourself and to know you are perfect just the way you were meant to be.” Self-love is defined as regard for one’s own well-being and happiness. I think Erika sets a precedent for importance of feeling good about oneself, standing up for yourself and becoming the best version of you that you can be.

It might sound somewhat superficial, but when I listen to Erika’s music I often imagine myself being the most confident me I can be. I imagine myself in full-glam, wearing something fabulous and feeling great. The type of music that makes you feel confident and sexy, is referred to as mood music. It makes you feel something, it creates an experience, not unlike positive self-talk or developing a confidence habit.

I often use her music and the music of other, similar artists, to do this. I look at it the same way I look at my other self-care practices, such as yoga or meditation. It creates a mind/body connection and it helps me see myself in a more positive light. It allows me to understand that I can evoke the same feeling about myself at anytime, if need or want to.

This is not to say that Erika or I think that self-confidence should only come from what we see on the outside, quite the contrary. It’s incredibly important to work on how you feel on the inside. However, I do think that the two can go hand-in-hand sometimes. I think the author Roald Dahl said it best when he said “If you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.” 

If by any chance Erika Jayne ever happens to read this, I would like to say…

YASSS KWEEN, I LOVE YOU! SLAYYYYYYYYY!

And also, thank you. Thank you for helping me explore my own inner Erika Jayne.

It’s liberating!

Check out Erika Jayne on Instagram, YouTube & Twitter.

XO

How cosplaying as Harley Quinn has changed my life.

Feeling like a freak is never easy. You feel incredibly out of touch with other people, it makes you think that no matter what you do or say, people are judging you or laughing at you. You never quite feel like you blend in right in social situations, it’s awkward. It’s an uncomfortable feeling. Being odd is like having spinach stuck in your teeth, you’re aware of it and so is everyone else.

I have always felt different from others but doesn’t everybody? We all feel disconnected from each other sometimes, so when we find a common interest or passion, it allows us to click with each other on another level. That is what cosplaying does for me, it allows me to be creative.

My first ever cosplay was dressing up as my favorite comic book character, Harley Quinn.

I remember walking down to the lobby of the hotel room I was staying in, to join a group of friends who I was cosplaying with at a convention that evening, we were dressed as Batman villains. My heart was racing and it took me all the courage in the world to leave my hotel room in full costume. It was terrifying, nauseating and ridiculously liberating all at once! There really is something incredibly strange about being in costume when it’s not Halloween. It’s odd!

Once I got over the feeling of being stared at by strangers and having a few old people laugh at me in the elevator, I was on a high! I got loads of compliments on my costume and a few people took pictures with me, it was such a confidence boost. Since then I have cosplayed as Harley Quinn many times, sometimes I dress up as her just for kicks, even when I am not at a convention.

I understand that may sound very strange to anyone who doesn’t understand cosplaying but it’s so much fun! I don’t think people do enough of what makes them happy sometimes, in fear that others might think it’s weird or unconventional. If something brings you joy, you have to indulge in that passion, not matter what others think. After all, life is for living & you only live once!

In a previous blog post I explained my thoughts on Harley Quinn as a character but her character means more to me than just being someone fun to dress up as. I relate to her personally and I find her to be very enchanting. Cosplaying as Harley has given me more confidence in myself, by allowing me to not take everything so seriously. You’re never too old to have fun cosplaying!

Cosplaying has been a major part of my life for about two years now. I don’t get to cosplay as often as I would like but there’s something to be said about planning a future cosplay. It gets my creative juices flowing and makes me excited to share my costume with other fans.

People may laugh at me for dressing up as a comic book characters in my spare time but the way I see it, who cares? I have a blast! I get to chat with other people who share a common interest and let loose for the day. I find cosplaying to be stress-reliving and a way to build my self esteem.

Any time I explain to someone that I like to dress up as comic book characters and go to conventions, I am met with raised eyebrows or suppressed laughter. It doesn’t even bother me because I know that those people probably care too much about what others think about them, to ever enjoy something so authentically. Cosplaying and Sci-Fi Conventions have allowed me to meet some of the most wonderful people I have ever met. I’ve made life long friends and memories that will stick with me forever. It’s been a blessing in my life & I’m so thankful for it.

For a long time I felt like I didn’t have a creative outlet that allowed me to express myself and once I found cosplaying, it was like a light bulb went off in my head. This was the perfect way for me to combine my love for fashion and geeky stuff together! It was perfect for me, I could piece together an outfit and feel creatively satisfied at the beginning, middle & end of the process.

Harley Quinn is a huge part of my life and truly has changed my life for the better.

To quote Bertrand Russel, ‘Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.’ Don’t be afraid to try something outside of the box, you might just enjoy it!